My First (and Probably Only) Fashion Blog: The Pros and Cons of Stitch Fix

The boxes are cute!

Let’s talk about Stitch Fix. Yeah, I signed up for it. You probably know what it is, but if you don’t, it’s a service where you receive a regular shipment of five clothing items that have been especially selected for you… after you have told them your measurements and sizes and likes and dislikes and such. If you like the clothes, you buy them; if you don’t, you send them back.

Lots of people do it – a woman I work with LOVES it, and she always looks great! My friend Molly, who’s a fashion blogger, reviews all her shipments piece by piece. She generally has a good experience. But you know what? I don’t think it’s for me.

I swear those black jeans
made my thighs look
like giant hams!

To be honest, I’ve only received two shipments, so maybe I’m not being fair to “the Fix”… The first shipment was a total bust… Here’s my review (and since it was in March, I can't photograph myself trying each piece on as other reviewers do – or even give you specific brand names!):

1. A pair of skinny black jeans full of spandex—Okay, I have huge thighs, and this made them look like ginormous hams. Seriously, I looked like female Porky Pig! No thanks.

2. A dark color-block sleeveless dress—It was a really thick jersey, so I’m guessing it was for winter? But why sleeveless for winter? It was too fitted to be a jumper, so guess I was supposed to constantly wear a jacket with it? Also, since it was so fitted, it served to draw a big arrow to each of my prominent saddlebags (outer thigh fat). Again, no.

I kept this top, but $38?

3. A dark, plaid straight skirt—it was dark tan and black, a very small check, made sort of like a jean skirt. I actually liked it, but the straight skirt… did I mention I have enormous saddlebags? Those babies poked right outa that thing!

4. A black and white 3/4 sleeve striped t-shirt with peach trim at the neck and sleeves—Although I like a 3/4 sleeve and a black and white stripe, I just didn’t like this top. Maybe it was the peach trim? It just looked kinda nerdy.

5. A short sleeved top that’s grey jersey in the front and a crepe-y black material with tiny white flowers on a back that was slightly longer than the front. This was actually a cute top, and the only piece I kept. I might not have, though, if I hadn’t already paid 20 bucks for the shipment. 

See that’s how it works is, each shipment is $20, but if you buy something, they take that $20 out of it. Which brings me to the first reason that SF is not for me—the cost. The $20 is not bad, but the price of each item of clothing, while not so expensive in the grand scheme of things, is more than I would normally pay*.

Because I do love clothes, but I just don’t have that much to spend on them. I wish I could remember how much each of these pieces cost but I just don’t—I do remember that the top I bought was $38. For a t-shirt.I know that, in general, you get what you pay for quality-wise, but for me to pay the prices of their clothes, I want something I absolutely LOVE.

I LOVED these jeans,
but they don't look like
this on ME!

Anyway, I sent most of the shipment back. I told my “stylist” why I didn’t like the items—not to be a bitch, but because I think it’s helpful to them so that the next shipment will be better…? And it did help! The second shipment was pretty good!

1. A pair of faded, torn boyfriend jeans—loved them. Needed jeans. They’re a little big, but I like a loose jean. I can always wear a belt!

2. A black and white patterned long-sleeved t-shirt dress. Although I had some questions (Why send a long sleeved dress in summer? Don't they know I live in the south?), I loved it. It fit great. AND it was as comfortable as pajamas!

3. A pair of sweet low-top red sneakers. Super cute.

4. A black 3/4 sleeve jersey top with shoulder cut-outs. It was really cute, had nice pleats in the front but I just am NOT into the shoulder cut-out fad. It needs to run its course, seriously.

5. A halter style top that looked gray, but was a very tiny black and white stripe. The cord around the neck was braided fabric. Loved it! Unfortunately, a 55-year-old woman who is a 32DDD doesn’t need to be NOT wearing a bra. And I’ve never met a strapless bra that could keep the girls up comfortably.

I kept this knit dress because
when I HAVE to go to the
office, I like to be comfy.

So out of this box (and they do come in a cute little box), I kept the jeans and the dress—together they were about $150.00. And I would have bought them if I had seen them in a store and had the patience to try them on… In that way, it was actually a huge help! Because of my crazy shape, I absolutely LOATHE trying on jeans (seriously it makes me cry!), so having a great pair sent right to my mailbox was totally worth it. The shoes were super cute, but $65? Plus I have a bunch of pairs of similarly-styled sneakers already… just couldn’t justify it. 

Okay, so I just contradicted myself by saying that it as worth it to have a pair of perfect jeans sent directly to me. But here's the second and more important thing… Stitch Fix has this Facebook game where they show you a bunch of photos of items and you give them thumbs up or thumbs down, and I realized today that I gave a thumbs down to 9 out of 10 of their items… Because their stuff is modern and trendy, and not what my style is… which is just too hard to nail down. 

I don’t want skinny pants (or ANY pants now that I have my great pair of jeans) or anything strapless or with spaghetti straps or cut-out shoulders… or roll-tab sleeves, blazers or cardigans or cowl necks or scarves – please, please no scarves! I don’t like bubble-gummy colors or pastels—too nerdy (unless the shape is kinda retro); I don’t like wedge or clunky heels...

Things I like:
Black coat with faux fur
and ribbon trim (H&M $50)
and Catskill Mountain
moccasins boots

What DO I like? I like cute retro dresses with empire waists, or of the “fit and flare” variety, stuff that isn’t too tight, long shirts/short dresses I can wear with black leggings… I like classic colors like black, white, gray, red, hot pink, khaki and more black… classic materials like blue and black denim, seersucker, madras, white eyelet, gingham, tweed and tartan plaids … classic pieces like pea coats, denim jackets, fisherman sweaters, black turtlenecks, white eyelet tops, oversized men’s rugby shirts, striped French sailor tops, kilts, Doc Martens, checkerboard Vans, black or white high-top Chuck Taylors, gladiator sandals, cowboy boots, Geiger boiled wool jackets… 

I also love funky pieces like my handmade boots from Catskill Mountain Moccasins and my "Red Queen Battle Coat"with striped lining. I like well-placed details like ribbons, ankle straps and kitten heels, lace, pleats, lacings, pretty buttons, contrasting trim, and nautical or military styling… 

I will wear almost anything if it's black, and to keep things interesting, I like to mix classic pieces with edgy finds. I wear cute dresses with Chuck Taylors, skirts with band T-shirts and I don't mind admitting that I buy clothes from (among other places) Target, Hot Topic, Brooks Brothers and... my husband's closet.

I’m a Mod, a rocker, a punk, a New Romantic, a steampunk – slightly retro, slightly gothic, very slightly preppy... and a curvy, weird, mutton-dressed-as-lamb, 55-year-old mom who works in an office three days a week. And I know all that stuff together is the opposite of something that is likely to come in a box—no matter how cute—from someone I’ve never met!

*It says on the SF web site that the average price for their pieces is $55.

When I'm 64

Will I be wearing this
when I'm 64?

In just a month I and my big mouth will be... gasp... FIFTY YEARS OLD!! What’s up with that?! Do I like it or hate it...?! Or some of each...?? Yeah, that’s it – some of each. 

For instance, despite occasional hiccups, I just get happier every year... the more years I live... well, you get the picture. Also, I’m getting closer and closer to heaven. Yes, sweet, sweet rest in the Everlasting Arms will be mine someday. I have no death wish whatsoever, but I am kinda looking forward to being where there is no more sorrow, no more night!

On the other hand, the aging process pretty much sucks. My body is falling apart... psoriasis, torn muscles, perimenopause, an addled brain, failing memory, high cholesterol... not to mention the more superficial changes: liver spots, wrinkles, skin tags, grey hairs... I’m a bit vain, so the decline in my already mediocre looks is kinda painful... especially with the focus the media put on beauty. My own upbringing involved a great emphasis on appearance, so that kind of thing does tend to stick out in my mind.

... or this?

If you know me, you will doubtless say, “what?” Because I don’t wear makeup, I don’t diet, I have a great head of shaggy hair, and am just generally kind of sloppy. You’d think that a person who thinks about appearances much would make some attempt at tarting herself up. But... nah. I’m too lazy, and, frankly, don’t have the time.

I am not interested in wearing makeup or dieting or any of the more radical youth extenders like Botox or plastic surgery, but I have always been interested in fashion. Well, not fashion in the sense of what is on the runway or being sold in stores... but style. Personal style. So one of the biggest questions I have as I grow old is... what do I wear? Both now and when I am truly elderly...? Occasionally I think, someday I’m going to have to start dressing my age... My next thought is, “Nah...” Like Simon Doonan, whom I’ve quoted before, “I loathe the idea of growing old gracefully. I fully intend to grow old eccentrically and dramatically. Brace yourselves!”

... or this?

So my “style” continues to be a mixture of basic and whimsical pieces in a mixture of styles: punk, preppy, hippie, vintage, quirky, athletic... I value comfort, but also love to catch eyes. I will wear my Catskill Mountain Moccasin boots with just about any outfit. They are comfortable, and being custom made, they are unique. They recall another time, which, as a history buff, I am all for. Other times, I like to channel my inner Joey Ramone and sport black Chuck Taylors. With a frilly dress. Because that’s me. 

How 'bout this?

But how will this look when I’m fifty? I’m guessing it won’t look much different than it does now, since fifty is just around the corner for me! So if it’s going to look ridiculous, it already does. And how will it look when I’m 60? 70? 80? You know what? From what I hear, the older you get, the less you care. (Of course, those who say this never met my mother!) In any case, if this turns out to be true for me, I might look ridiculous, but my concern will decrease proportionately. 

My other silly, superficial question is this: should I dye my hair? Right now that shaggy mop of hair is a nice chestnutty brown, with only the occasional grey hair popping up, and even then you have to look really carefully to see it. I always have a little debate with myself when I see one - to pull or not to pull? But what about when I start to really go grey? Will I look like an old hippie woman? Should I braid it to minimize the impact on the eye? Should I finally give myself a shorter, more becoming cut? Should I dye it and look weird with a wrinkly face but no grey? Maybe this, too, will be something I am unconcerned about. That would be nice. 

Some glad morning when this life is o'er,
I'll fly away!

So there you have it. It seems that my goal as I age is not to work harder on my appearance, but to care less, while continuing to have fun with my own personal style. Of course this only addresses the superficial aspects that trouble me. But that’s the kind of crap I think about. And, really, the other stuff doesn’t bother me. I’m honestly looking forward to my old age unfolding before me, growing old with my husband and friends, watching my child grow up... getting to know God more and more as I am buoyed higher and higher toward heaven by God’s eternal grace.

You... yes, you... are a bird of paradise.

Last night’s food for thought: a documentary called Bill Cunningham New York... it really turned my brain around! Bill Cunningham is an 83-year-old photographer who has two regular spreads in the New York Times – one featuring society parties, and the other, people in the street and what they are wearing.

Even though I am not particularly well dressed most of the time, I am fascinated by fashion. I love to have fun with what I wear, and ever since I was a kid I’ve watched how people dressed. Even when we were kids, if my sister and I were stuck somewhere waiting on our mother who, to put it kindly, likes to take her time... well, we’d pass the time watching the people’s shoes... We’d say the shoes under our breath as the people walked by... “wallabee... topsider... tennis shoe..." and, yes, we judged them. Because in our opinion it was really shoes that could make or break an outfit. Because when you’re a 12-year-old girl from a small tobacco town in North Carolina, you really know fashion, right? (In our defense, we did wear out our mom’s monthly copies of Vogue...)

Anyway, this guy Bill Cunningham, spends his time riding a bicycle around  – even at 83 – photographing the fashion parade that is New York City by day, then is off to balls and galas at night, taking snaps of debutantes and socialites...

You would think that as fashion professional, he would be picky... even judgemental about people’s fashion choices, but, as one of the people commenting in the movie says, Bill is  a true egalitarian. He loves the everyday people he sees on the streets, the socialites like Brooke Astor, and the drag queens that rule the night equally. And it is true that, while he covers the runway shows he has a discriminating eye that can nail it when a designer has shown true edge, and when a real trend is being created. In short, he is hard on the designers – but only in the sense that he wants them to be at their creative best... not copycats. Meanwhile, he shows tremendous grace to the people who are out there on the street wearing the clothes.

It reminds me of how Jesus expected a great deal from the religious leaders of his day, but showed great grace to the ordinary folks. (Jesus replied, “And you experts in the law, woe to you, because you load people down with burdens they can hardly carry, and you yourselves will not lift one finger to help them.) 

Bill Cunningham says he simply loves photographing beautiful women dressed beautifully, and is always on the lookout for some glorious bird of paradise... But he also snaps everyday people wearing everyday clothes in their own way. You can tell he loves every kind of person. 

A former colleague tells the story of his break with the fashion industry publication W. He had compiled a photo essay of designer fashions worn by models on the runway to be shown side-by-side with women he’s seen on the streets wearing the same clothes. His intent was to show how women made these striking pieces worked for themselves in the real world... The editors of the magazine, however had their own plan. They made it into sort of a “DOs and DON’Ts” column, making fun of the ordinary women. Well, Bill was livid... and that was the end of his relationship with THAT magazine!

Yes, Bill Cunningham is loaded with integrity, humility, kindness, enthusiasm, and ... eccentricities. Until recently he lived alone in his studio in Carnegie hall, sleeping on a cot amidst a forest of file cabinets and attending church every Sunday... And I learned a lot from the peek into his life that the movie gave me.

So... what did I learn? That EVERYONE is beautiful... Of course it’s more fun to be creative, and to see people who have been creative with their clothes... but every fashion choice communicates something, and everyone is worth listening to. Even if all they are trying to say is: “I value comfort” or “I like to blend in” or “I read fashion magazines” or “This is what they make me wear to work” or “I have great legs” or, a favorite: “I just don’t care.”

So, you, sitting there reading this... whatever you have on... you’re beautiful, and I hear what you’re saying!