(Stating the obvious, preaching to the choir and all that...)

"Talk about a preachy book!"

Back in the old days as a brand new Christian, I once came out to my Bible study… as a non-Bible reader. I don’t know how long I had belong to the Chapel Hill BIBLE Church – a year, maybe? I soaked up every Bible-expository sermon proclaimed in the “pulpit,” listened to tapes of them over and over, and attended Bible studies and classes like a good beer on a Friday night at the end of a long week, but I had no inclination to actually READ the thing!

About a year later, I announced to the same group that I had finished reading the Bible! That was when this fantastic woman named Patience Teeny (her real name) told me that after my first declaration, she had begun praying that I would be seized by the desire to read it. Weird, huh? I guess not.

The Top 100 Guitarists 
of All Time? THAT's a 
fun list! This is #1, 
by the way.

Anyway, I can’t say enough how lovely the Bible is. Confusing, yes. Violent, yes. Dated. Yes. But also clear, sweet, and eternally relevant. It has entertainment value – a warrior getting nailed to the ground with a tent peg through the head, a fat dead guy whose servants don’t check on him because they’re sure he’s on the crapper, a talking donkey, whole armies being wiped out by a dude wielding the jawbone of an ass… to name a few! It has history, poetry, erotica, doctrine, good advice…

SINNER!!!!

Sure some parts are easier to read than others. It once occurred to me that reading the parts about wandering in the desert were a bit like… well, wandering in the desert!  And I remember the first time I read the book of Chronicles. That book does have some history parts, but also, it’s A BUNCH OF LISTS!!! And not fun ones, either… like the Top 100 Guitarists of All Time or Top Ten Facts about Raging Bull. No, these are genealogies and military rolls, lists of temple furnishings and stuff like that… And Leviticus. That’s full of handy instructions like what to do if there’s mildew in your house. Or if you have an infectious skin disease. The first time I read that book I thought I would never make it through. But then the second time… I’m not sure why, but I thought it was utterly fascinating!

Because I was familiar
with the Bible, I saw God
in this movie about Scottish
heroin addicts...

It’s my feeling that if you continue to read the Bible throughout your life, it will continue to show you new things about yourself, about life, and about God. You may be reading the same words, but new things will stand out to you. For instance, I was reading Deuteronomy during the fall, and that book is so chock full of stuff about social justice and fair treatment of the disenfranchised that it really affected how I viewed the election.

My own repeated readings have revealed to me a book that is at once sweetly familiar and continually baffling… Because most of all, the Bible is our best look into the mind of God – who is at once sweetly familiar and continually baffling. I mean there’s really no way for us to KNOW God completely here on earth, but this is our best chance… after all, John says that Jesus is the Word made flesh. (John 1:14)

and this movie about an 
art thief and a hired killer...

And what I see when I read the Word is a God who loves sinners. I love this quote from renowned theologian Homer Simpson: “Look at this Bible I just got. 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a sinner! Except for this guy.” I’m not going to say the Bible isn’t preachy – it’s full of sermons, right? And you can’t argue that it’s full of sinners. It absolutely is. Except for this guy. I’m assuming Homer is referring to Jesus. Because he “knew no sin.” And that’s my point. As Paul says in 2 Corinthians 5:21, “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” Because GOD LOVES SINNERS!!!! Even when Israel was at its worst, God pursued “her” like … well, like my persistent husband pursued me. And let me tell the guy was DETERMINED! But that's a story for another day.

and even in this!

I love the Bible and all its sinners simply because then I know God loves me too.  Every word of this book is a breath of fresh air to my moldy old cobweb-filled brain. Lots of things crowd my life and brain, but I like to think that knowing God is my heart’s desire, and His book gets me closer every time I plunge its puzzling depths. Sitting down before it every day (or nearly) at least declares my intentions!

And it's not just about those few minutes in front of the book – once it's in your brain, you will more easily recognize Him when you see Him. I could never see Him in movies and music without the foundation the Bible has given me. I mean, normally when I’m watching a film, it’s Bible verses that pop into my mind to direct me to Jesus. (This happened in reverse with Joy Davidman, the wife of C.S. Lewis – in a moment of despair God came into her room to comfort her. Later as she read about Jesus in the gospels, she recognized that Presence in her room.) 

My statement of intention.
(Coffee is not essential,
but preferred.)

Other ways to know God – the Holy Spirit, for instance, can’t be nailed down (John 3: 8). The Bible you can consult again and again. One time, before I was familiar with the sacred text, I was struggling with doubt, having very specific questions... and (what I believe was) the actual Holy Spirit gave me a verse! I looked it up in a concordance, and Bob's your uncle! The answer to my nagging question! Thank God for concordances, am I right?! So anyway, I’m thinking everything’s working together here… 

And I am not saying that I am some super Bible reader/studier, if that’s what you were thinking. In fact I’m pretty haphazard at it these days. When I was single, I had all kinds of time for such things, but life comes in phases and this phase, for me, does not lend itself to intensive study. On good days, I read one chapter. Then I read the notes at the bottom the pages of my NIV Bible. Those little blurbs really help give you a good idea of context and language peculiarities. At this rate, I should get through the Bible in three+ years... Yeah, I'm taking it at a leisurely pace... but as I said, I'm declaring my intentions.

This post is really not turning out how I had planned... I mean, I can’t begin to cover the importance of the Bible with one little blog post, and I am sure I am pretty much stating the obvious, preaching to the choir and all that... I’m just telling you. It’s a beautiful book full of beautiful things. It means a lot to me. God's in it. We're in it. If your aim is to get to know God – and He wants you to know Him – this is a good way. 

Bigmouth, Oscar Edition Part 2

While my husband is slow to praise most movies, he is always up for one made by Quentin Tarantino. Well, it just so happens that one of the films nominated  for Best Picture (and other awards) was his Django Unchained. Being a good sport of a wife, I have seen some of Tarantino’s movies, I haven’t seen this one. Tom went alone – not because I had any objections. It just worked out that way.

Anyway, here’s how Wikipedia describes the story: “Set in the antebellum era of the Deep South and Old West, the film follows a freed slave who treks across the United States with a bounty hunter (played by Waltz) on a mission to rescue his wife from a cruel and charismatic plantation owner.”

Django Unchained was riddled with graphic violence, foul language and racial epithets. Or so I’m told… That’s how all Tarantino’s movies are. Lots of blood and guts and gruesomeness and political incorrectness. This latest created a bit of controversy because of our nation’s recent focus on gun violence.

Nominated in five Oscar categories, Django Unchained actually won two – one for Original Screenplay, the other going to Christoph Waltz for Best Supporting Actor.

Waltz was a guest host on Saturday Night Live recently in one of the funnier shows they’ve put on lately. One of the sketches was a prerecorded “trailer” for a fake Tarantino movie – a spree of blood, guts and revenge called, Djesus Uncrossed.

I have a link for this, but I am hesitant to post it because it was so gross. You can certainly search for it yourself if you are not easily offended. During my first viewing of it, I think it would be accurate to say I was in a full body cringe. It featured Jesus rolling the stone away and saying in a menacing voice, “Guess who’s back.” He then proceeded to butcher the Romans in a variety of disgusting ways. When a Roman soldier exclaims, “Jesus H. Christ!,” he responds “The H is silent.” Brad Pitt as Peter tells the other disciples that they owe him 100 Roman scalps each, like his character does in Tarantino’s Inglorious Basterds.

See? It’s grossly offensive… but hilarious. And kinda thought-provoking. I mean, revenge is, I think, something that people naturally desire. All through the Psalms, people are asking God to avenge them. And, if I understand correctly, the faithful Jews of Jesus’s day actually did expect some kind of warrior guy who was going to open a can of whup-ass on their enemies.

Austrian actor Christoph Waltz (left)
won Best Supporting Actor for his role
in Django Unchained.

What they got instead was a guy who said, “Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called children of God,” and gave the enemies the whup-ass can AND the can opener. (One of the critics’ quotes on the fake trailer was “A less violent Passion of the Christ.” Because, really what happened to Jesus was crazy violent, and I'm guessing Mel Gibson wanted us to see every bit of what he imagined it was like.)

So, really, this blogpost is actually thematically linked with the previous one in more ways than one. Sure it’s about an Oscar winner. But it’s also about how the Kingdom of God comes in a subtle, often unrecognizable package.

Right now, anyway. According to the Revelation of St. John and other Biblical texts, Jesus is going to return. And this time it won’t be so quiet. All sorts of havoc is going to ensue. But for right now, you could say the Kingdom of Heaven is like a mustard seed. Tiny, but about to grow into something huge and beautiful and useful. Or like a grain of yeast that I put in my bread machine and it gets all churned up with the paddle into the whole two-pound ball of dough… Of course, maybe using a labor saving device takes some of the umph out of that one…!

The Kingdom of
Heaven is like yeast...

These are all (sort of) parables that Jesus told… because He knew “what was in a man.” He knew we’d want big flashy displays of power and might and vengeance. But that’s not what he was about. In one instance, his friends wanted to call down lightning on some particularly unhospitable folks, but Jesus outright rebuked them. In some versions of the Bible He says, “For the Son of man is not come to destroy men's lives, but to save them.”

I don’t really know how to end this, my second Oscar-driven post. Maybe we all have a picture of what God / Jesus is all about. Does he look and act like Santa Claus? Does he kick ass and take names? Is He an avenging angel? Or maybe, He’s a still small voice…?

In the book of Kings, Elijah prays for help and this happens:

"The Lord said, 'Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.'

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave."

When I read this I think, my world is so loud… what if God is whispering to me and I don’t hear him? I guess I’m actually hoping that He’s talking to me through the movies…

Bigmouth, Oscar Edition

I will confess right now that I didn’t think Seth McFarlane was necessarily the worst Oscar host ever. Sure he was offensive and immature… but what did people expect? Isn’t that his schtick? My favorite gag he pulled was the Sound of Music reference when he introduced Christopher Plummer! Baaahhaaaaaa!!! Well, I thought it was funny, anyway.

I don’t know about you, but I am still not used to having so many Best Picture nominees. Does it cheapen it? I don’t know. Before we had a kid, it was not unusual for us to have seen ALL of the feature-length nominated films IN THE THEATRE. Now, we do the best we can.

In the case of this year’s winner, Argo, we managed to “rent” it from iTunes the night before the Oscars aired. My husband, ever the critic, said, “It was okay,” like he says about most things he doesn’t outright despise, but I gotta say I really liked it… and if you saw it, you can probably imagine why.

Because of course, if a movie is about a guy rescuing people, I’m going to leap right to a Jesus comparison like I always do, right? Well, of course I am. Because that’s exactly where my one-track mind went.

I’m probably the only person in the US of A who hadn’t seen it by this time, but if you haven’t, Argo is based on a true story, and takes place during the Iran hostage crisis during Jimmy Carter’s presidency. All the people at the American Embassy were taken hostage by the insanely angry Iranian revolutionaries. Six Americans escaped and were holed up in the Canadian ambassador’s abode, and the CIA was tasked with getting them out.

And the Oscar goes to...

Enter Ben Affleck as Tony Mendez – a guy who specializes in rescuing people. His crackpot scheme involves going to Iran in the guise of a Canadian movie director scouting locations for a sci-fi film called Argo. His elaborate plan involves setting up a production office, running ads in Variety, and staging events with actors in costume. The muckety-mucks at the CIA don’t think much of this, but the best they can come up with was having them ride bikes hundreds of miles to the Turkish border.

The real Tony Mendez

So despite complete lack of support from the CIA… even when they try to pull the plug on the operation at the last minute, Tony Mendez keeps moving. Says the CIA guy: “Six Americans get pulled out of a Canadian diplomat’s house and executed, it’s another world outrage. Six Americans get caught playing movie make-believe with the CIA at the airport and executed, it’s a national embarrassment.” Yeah, the CIA is worried about their image.

But not Tony. He can’t just leave those people there because… well, he just can’t. He goes forward with the plot because… it’s what he does. It’s who he is. “We’re responsible for those people,” is what he says.

(Which brings to my mind these two stories Jesus told: “Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’  I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.

Therefore be as shrewd as snakes
and as innocent as doves.

Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Doesn’t she light a lamp, sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

See, to God, it's not just about image or numbers; each individual is precious and savable.

But back to our story… Of course when he gets there he has to convince the six people to buy into it. Needless to say, they’re scared. Some have a hard time trusting him. Maybe they had expected a showy military rescue with Navy Seals or Green Berets or something.

The most doubty guy sarcastically spouts off to him, “Is this the part where we say,  ‘That’s so crazy it just  might work’? C’mon...” Because, yes, it is a crazy plan. Then he tells the rest of the hiders, “That man out there, he’s got bad cards, he’s gonna lose. If he loses, it’s our lives. But then his wife says, “And his life too.”

Violence and power were the
only things Sauron knew.

Because that’s just it. That guy risked his life. “I’ll be with you,” Tony says, “This is what I do.” And God didn’t use his awesome power or his avenging angels to save us, did He? He got right down in the dirt with us, took on all our pain and humiliation Himself, and is even now carrying us out of the crazy, riot-torn country country with Him... even the doubty ones. Whoever wants to come, really... just fall in!

It reminds me a little bit of the Lord of the Rings – you know how Sauron expected his opponents to use the ring to obtain power and defeat him. It never occurred to him that they would destroy it. It was a plan too subtle for his evil mind. Because sometimes that’s what is needed. Remember when Jesus told his disciples, “I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.”

Maybe the comparison of Argo to our own rescue from sin and self is a little obvious and amateurish, but I don't really mind. Any story or piece of art that reminds me of it is a thing of beauty to me!

This Pilgrim's Regress

An early Easter ... good
news for candy lovers!

First of all, I’d like to say, how weird is it that Easter is so early this year? My Lenten sacrifice blog followed right on the heels of my New Year’s Resolution blog, which I admit I was super late in posting.

Since I sort of felt like I was not “doing my good deeds in secret” I vowed that I would make sure to tell you about my miserable failures as well! So… here goes!

Here's what I have to look
forward to... nice. At least 
I'll have a ready excuse!

As far as my New Year’s resolution, which was to “engage conflict,”… well, a big part of it was that it was not about picking fights, but about going deeper. In order to do this right, I knew that I would have to exercise complete patience and kindness. Well, that didn’t happen. At the first sign of trouble, what did I do? I yelled at my husband. I was harsh in the extreme. I think it scared him.

I know it’s lame, but I’m going to blame it on the menopause. Now, I’m not IN menopause. Lordy, no – not yet. But I HAVE noticed some of the symptoms they ascribe to onset of menopause… specifically: "increased irritability, anxiety, fatigue, and blue moods"… not to mention, a good deal of “brain fog.” It’s not that I’m not going to try to control this aspect of “the change” as it happens, but I am going to be blaming all my stuff on it for a while.

I apologized, and all, and things seemed to get back to normal, but really, my husband is a sensitive dude… It really hurt him. So that’s how THAT one is going. It reminded me of the time that Jonathan Inman,my pastor in Asheville, told me that marriage was best lived in a state of constant repentance. He couldn’t have been more right, in my case.

One of Bill's creations... he 
says it's a "monkey temple."

Now, about Lent… You may recall that I’m trying to give up “my own agenda” – that is, to pay attention when my son is talking and come look when he says, “Look!” Well, this past Monday was President’s Day, which meant a day off from school for him. Often, Bill is pretty good at entertaining himself… he’ll watch a Harry Potter movie or an episode of The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones… or he’ll make crazy things out of Legos, rubber bands, paper clips, tape and carboard boxes… or he’ll run back and forth making up stories in his mind, being, what he calls, “in his own world.” This day, however, he couldn’t seem to stop talking. To me. While I was trying to work. About things that happened at camp two years ago. It is in no way an exaggeration when I say that he talked for 6 hours straight. I documented it on Facebook. Commenters were calling it a “Billibuster.”

Van Morrison – he 
knows about crazy love.

And I am here to tell you that it tried my patience. In fact, I didn’t even TRY to have patience. “STOP TALKING!” I kept saying. More than once I made the classic gun-to-head shooting motion that universally signifies, “You’re making me want to kill myself.” So much for Lenten vows, right?

Yeh, I failed on both counts. Yeh, I’m super lame. But every day’s a new day, am I right? I just gotta keep going. And every time I fail, I remember the One whose love never fails. The One who makes me righteous and whole. He gives me love, love, love, crazy love… Oh wait… that’s a Van Morrison song… but no less appropriate!

So that’s my progress report. No matter how many steps I take backward, Jesus takes me all the way forward!